Daily life
Poetry - ANTHOLOGY


"Rescue Me"

My mind functions differently without you
Alone I wander,
Through Dark, narrow tunnels

From what I believe,
he longs for love.
Loneliness not deserved

A friend I desire,
Too much.

What I do for you.
Savoring your kindness, care, and love.

Free me!
Make me realize,
Thoughts are only thoughts
He told me to take a look at the moon. Beautiful it was, and a thought of you flashed through my mind. Horrible it was, and so I made you disappear. A smile on my face, cuz I know he's the only one for me. Now every time I look at the moon I think of him. And he's what I need.
You told me to take a look at the moon. Beautiful it was, but a thought of him flashed through my mind. Horrible it was, so I made him disappear. A smile on my face, cuz I know you're the only one for me. Now everytime I see the moon, I think of you. And you are all that I need.
You invade my every thought.
My heart is racing.
It beats a little louder with every word you speak.
I want you here.
My body's aching, freezing cold;
I need you here.
I don't ask for much, just to be protected and wanted.
And that you be my personal radiator.
A kiss that feels like
in the moment no one else is around
and looking from the outside in,
the world spins around you two.
Like in movies.
I giggle so much in response to all the beautiful things you say.
I don't know what else to do.
I only know how to feel.
Feels like a dream but it's so real.
You take my breath away.
So I found a guy who is really special and so different than any other guy I have ever known.
Because of a Teenage Reputation
Almost Lover (not my work)

Your fingertips across my skin. The sweetest sadness in your eyes, clever trick. I’d never want to see you unhappy. I thought you’d want the same for me. Goodbye, my almost lover, my hopeless dream. I'm trying not to think about you. Can't you just let me be? So long my luckless romance. My back is turned on you. Should've known you'd bring me heartache. Almost lovers always do. We walked along a crowded street. You took my hand and when you left you kissed my lips. You told me you would never ever forget these images. I cannot go to the ocean, try the streets at night, and wake up in the morning, without you on my mind. So you're gone and I'm haunted, and I bet you are just fine. Did I make it that easy for you to walk right in and out of my life?
Is Happiness too much to ask for?

Now I'm stronger,
trying to find my way.
My conscious tells me I'm by myself,
but in reality my soul has hope.
Hope for these friends;
Hope that their love won't end.
Do you care or are you simply just curious?
That's my conscious again
Either way I will wait
Wait for more change
The change that leads to my comfort
My satisfactions,
needs.
Clueless

I want to write a good note,
But I don't know what to say.
I have a small ounce of hope,
But I don't know if it'll stay.
I, I, I ... "It's all about me."
Is it? (the questioning begins)
Painted a picture of my future,
but YOU is all that's seen.
Though Why?
Will there be anything else other than this Love Quest.
How can one start over
Rather, how can one not have another to share a life with?
What shall be first priority after the rest have been set and done
Do the finished lead to others
How will I know? I want to know!
Do I have to wait? I'm impatient!
Aren't we sent signs? Miracles?
Do those even exist ...
Will I find out?
Patience, for now, nothing can be decided.
It was you Smoking loud, speaking softly. (not my work)

Why am I thinking of you after all you've done. Was my heart fighting for you when my mind wants you gone? Held on for too long, I should have learned from all the songs. Who knew that they were trying to tell me about you. And the crazy things you do, how could you be so cruel? Now I'm sitting here, listening to all of those old songs. Crazy that they're talking about you and I just sing along. How did I go wrong? They gave me the sign, but I didn't listen to them. You had me step off the realness. The head was sick. Maybe I'm crazy. Looking in the mirror, pointing fingers at myself. You can do better. I'm heated; I can't say that I'm chillin'. I’m not feeling what you're saying. If you don't say what you're feeling now, take the words back and think them through. Those songs on the radio might be about you. I hope she knows I'm trying to tell her about you. You can learn from the songs on the radio.
To Take A Step Forward

Taking a step back in time,
My past full of mistakes.
I can't believe I let you use me.
Well I found someone better,
Who appreciated me.
And if I would've let you go sooner,
I wouldn't be so alone now.
I hate all the What if’s.
I ask Him now,
Why didn't we just let go?
We were the ones who were treated badly
We were good for each other
We helped each other
And we wanted each other.
Despite others' thoughts,
He and I could’ve been great.
This is the last straw.
Motivated
It makes me think of
speakers
It makes me think of helping people
Irony
because I'm the one in need
(No one hears my plea)
What is this sudden motivation?
The crave for change
My human hunger for beauty
A beautiful life,
I seek;
to live with my family.
Problems free
Motivated to write
Motivated to take action
Motivated to finally share my thoughts
I Hate This Love Song (not my work)

We were so beautiful, you know. You taught me what love was. The warm rays of the sun are of another world. The fields of reeds are dancing all alone. I remain paused at a green hill, holding a conversation I’ve yet to finish with her. The sky is of an expressionless face that holds no answers. You’re probably hiding behind the clouds; you’re probably a star. I close my eyes and feel your breath. I dream of you. A smile spreads across my lip; you’re breathing with me now. Time, please stop, don’t divide her and I. Wind, stop blowing. This is my last letter to you.
A to Z

Almost two months later
It feels stretched though
I've been through a lot
I know I'm not the only one
But I'm alone right now
I'm okay without you
The distance has helped
I thought I'd need you all the time
But I realized I can be on my own
I haven't created myself yet
Or found what I truly want
But I know what I want
What's best for me right now
You'll be just fine
Because I'll always be here
I know that you know that
If you ever think otherwise
Then you're the one in denial
Hope is all I have
It's what I rely on
I don't see why not
I haven't been proven wrong yet
I'm ready to move forward
Still with you in my life
If you ever want to know my intensions
Just ask
Your curiosity will be answered with honesty
Always and forever
No matter our actions
No matter our words
And no matter my dislikes
Remember that
Unknown

Everyone's ready to take action
To move on
I'm stuck reminiscing
and worrying about what'll happen
when the Change comes
The moment we've been waiting for
I'm going to lose some people
but gain more
I've been at the same time patient
and impatient
I've made decisions
I've tried new things
I'm still on the edge
Without Denial

November 9th, 2011
10:25pm
If not now, then when.
My life is finally changing.
But I also need to make some changes
of my own.
For some reason
a part of me is hurting.
But I'm wondering if that is hurt,
or the remarkable feeling of Letting Go.
Only time will tell, he says.
And I feel the need to apply that to
myself
No matter what, I will improve
Just because of Time
I am that sixty-seven percent
Because I have made it that way.
I regret some things
I am proud of a lot of things
I've made mistakes
I've made great decisions
I've made friends
A relationship
An unbreakable bond
I am ready
To be free
From this obstruction
No more, will I be controlled
It’s Hard to Start Something New:

Enamor

By Yarida Cruz
CAPTIVATE

What more can you want than Relief
It's time to be who I've always wanted
Whom I want to become
My ideal self
With her own satisfactions
I'm so happy at this point
Although, I have a lot to learn
and there's more to come
I'm young
but I feel this is something in my life that is finally right
Happy
That word repeated over and over
in my mind
Happy
and that's all I can say
He...
So many words to depict Him
I'm too fascinated
Consider me Blown
HOW TO LOVE (not my work)

You've had a lot of crooks trying to steal your heart. Never really had luck, couldn’t ever figure out how to love. You've had a lot of moments that didn’t last forever. Now you're in the corner trying to put it together. You can’t have a man look at you for five seconds without you being insecure. You never credit yourself, so now that you're older it’s seems like you came back ten times over. Now you’re looking through all of your thoughts and looking over your shoulder. See I just want you to know that you deserve the best; you’re beautiful. And I just want you to know, you’re far from the usual.
I JUST WANNA BE HAPPY

Not just a replacement
I'm taking my time to know him
In his arms is where I want to stay
To Never let go

I felt so secure and safe
Wanted and protected again
His warmth pervaded my veins
and depleted my cold blood

My heart is mending
I don't feel broken anymore
This feeling beyond happiness
This feeling is indescribable

His touch
His hugs
His kiss
Closure

Until we're together again
I'll just have to dream
Never wanting to wake up
I do want to make this reality
SHOW ME YOUR PERSEVERANCE

You want to make this last
Let's leave our past in the past
You want to be with me
It'll take some time you'll see
I need to know if you can handle
The distance we'll soon have to face
Can you confide in me
And keep your stand
Can you be patient
And not forget me
Maintain your maturity and kindness
Remain blissful and strong
For this is what I need
To make that move
To be with you
FALL DOWN

It's never easy starting something new
There's always doubt
Like me, You wonder if this is what you want
Is this what's right for you
Little by little the answers unravel
The good turns to bad
Your chest fills with the horrible feeling of emptiness
You want to stop it right away
Make it go away
But you let it happen
You just wait
‘Til it gets worse or better
You're unsure
Your thoughts are unclear
It happens again
And you don't know what to do
Lost again
Hoping to be found
I notice the Hope is always present
And instantly begin to feel whole again
So I look for Him
WE ALL WANT LOVE(not my work)

Some say love isn't worth a buck but I'll give every dime I have left to have what I've only been dreaming about. Everybody wants something; What are you living for? Everybody needs something, fighting for something; I know what you're fighting for. ‘Cause we all want someone there to hold. We just want somebody. We all want to be somebody's one and only. We all want to be warm when it's cold. No one wants to be left scared and lonely. We all want the same thing. I'm able to close my eyes, yet my heart's not so blind. I feel so entitled; love owes me. I want what's mine.
TWO WEEKS

I've Fallen.
I'm trying to get up
But I cry.
Tears drown me to sleep
And I feel helpless.
Weak and tired,
I become,
With nowhere to run.
I can't escape my past.
I was so happy just 14 days ago.
In another two weeks
my dreams are supposed to come true.
At this point I don't know what to do.
I wonder if I should just force myself to be happy,
Use my Hope to create my own Happiness,
Stay Strong because there's so much to look forward to,
Literally get on my feet.
Even though there is so much bad,
I must absorb only the good.
Today this Depression can be beat.
SWEET DREAMS LOVE

I don't really know what true love is
I'm not even sure if it exists
I see something happening with just one kiss
This boy, he just brings me so much happiness
Pure joy, and I don't want it to end
Right now I can only say that we're just friends
An open heart I must recommend
'Cause my heart, he sure did mend
I go to sleep every night
with him on my mind
Waiting for the day
to call him mine
Waiting,
Waiting.
1 CORINTHIANS 13:4-7 (not my work)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always
protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
THE END

I don't know how it happens;
My mind wonders randomly in the past.
I've endured a lot of pain back then;
Been hurt through and through;
Experienced much happiness too.
I don't know what takes me back.
Why I would even want to think of it again.
I really considered fixing things
But only to get a temporary feeling.
Thinking further I realize
All I need is my new guy.
Just let go they say.
Just throw your past away.
There will be many more chances,
Opportunities
And memories,
To be given, taken
and made.
BORN AGAIN

Nothing can break my happiness
I feel it can only increase
He is the brighter side
And now I can sleep in peace.
RELYING ON TIME

It sucks that you have to live in the present
That you can’t look ahead in your future
Because it is never promised
That life lessons tell you to stray from your past
And that you can't do anything but wait
It sucks that you are told so many things
But people always fall back on their word
You make mistakes
and at some point you are the mistake
No one wishes for this to happen
But for some reason
That’s just the way the world is
The way we live is supposed to be
So beautifully
And yet every day someone must endure
Some pain
We tell ourselves this is the way
To help us grow and become strong
Why am I always proven wrong
BOBBIE ON THE POLE (Revamped)

Bobbie sits on the cold floor with a handful of other girls surrounding her. Their lunch boxes are all laid out, full of different shapes and sized pills. Her son in the corner plays with his imaginary friend while each girl passes the poison around. Bobbie is pale and all bones. They all are. Zombies, quiet and slow, as they do their deed.
CAN WE STAY UP(not my work)

Let me start with a soft caress. I wanna show you I'm not like the rest. So put me to the test. Anything that you feel let it go. I wanna take things nice and slow. So baby lose control. I want this more than I want anything. So let's stay up tonight, girl that's all. Let me sing you a song cause it's all about love tonight. It's all you see so stay up with me tonight. So come lay here right next to me. Let me show you what love can be. I'll kiss those lips softly. While I'm looking you right in the eyes, girl I slowly go deep inside. Your heart is what I mean. It's all about you and me. It's right. This is where I need to be. So don't leave me. I need this just as bad as you do.
I WON’T BLACK OUT (Revamped)

I can't begin to talk about us
or my true feelings for you
because when I start to think
and look back on all the good
my mind is interrupted
with the idea of your 'love' being shared.
I'm not that kind of girl
and you said it meant more for you,
but you've said a lot of things.
How can it be so simple,
so easy and mean nothing?
Since you've left you've moved on
to six others, I know.
In a matter of two months
I can't believe you did that to me.
Oh and yeah, I heard your new girl has VD.

A CHAPTER OF LOATHING

Today I actually lost my appetite with the thought of you
I was enjoying breakfast
then couldn’t stop thinking of you
It’s quite annoying
I became so angry and threw my half full plate in the trash
So many little things remind me of you
Every time I cut my food with a knife and fork
You
When someone asks about my tattoos
You
If the game Guitar Hero is mentioned
You
Seeing guys with gauges
You
Forest Park, Eastfield Mall, Putnam High School, My swimming pool
You
Trying to deal with the hardships in my life
You
Because you were always there
Ask me now how I feel; if I hate you
I do
WAITING IN FRONT OF SCANLON HALL AT WESTFIELD UNIVERSITY TO GO TO SPRINGFIELD

I stare at my eight and a half sized cream checkered Vans
Keeping my head hung down like death
Protecting my bare chest from winter’s bitter air
I look up across the street three or four times impatiently
I know I’m early just so I won’t miss it
At this point I’m regretting not learning how to drive
When my parents bothered me about it at sixteen
The bus finally arrives now
And ahead of me is an hour back to my home town
A silent ride on my part where only
Strangers surround me
Which always causes
Aggravation, discomfort and exhaustion
The tiny blue seats are not relaxing
And disgusting smells linger
If I don’t have my iPod with me to listen to music
The trip becomes ten times worse
A lot of people talk too much
And say ignorant things
It takes forever to get to a destination because of
All the people aboard
And each bus stop is two blocks apart but
It is all worth having my time with Him yet again
Gateway

Before I started my homework I needed some motivation. I grabbed my colorful sticker filled laptop and signed on to my Facebook account. Catching up on all my friends’ new stories didn’t take up enough time in order for motivation to rise. My complicated relationship was on my mind. I was confused and I needed to make a decision very soon. I wanted to look back on my past to help choose the fate of my future. So I read my online personal blog. The whole time I relived those memories tears wouldn’t stop flowing from my tired eyes. I was beginning to use up my whole box of owl tissues. I’m lost in my own mind. Running away from all of my thoughts. My past full of mistakes and here I am about to make some more. I tripped and fell into the pit of my conscious.


PICTURES OF FRANCE



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Poetry - ANTHOLOGY (Daily life)    -    Author : Yarida - USA


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